Expat Advice: Relationships in Paris, France

What is the name of the city or town that you are reporting on?

Paris

What is your current status? Are you single, dating, in a long-term relationship, married or divorced?

I am married to a French man - no children.

What is it like in your country of residence for someone with your relationship status (married/divorced/dating)? If you're single, how do you meet other people? Do English-speaking people tend to gravitate to certain parts of your city?

Well the best part about being married is it's so easy to get residency and working papers!!

If you do not have children, do you generally spend your social time with other expat couples? If not, what else do you like to do as a couple?

Our friends come from France and all over the world. But they do tend to be in two distinct groups because of age and language differences. The friends we have through my husband are more often French and in our age group and "social class." I have a lot of anglo friends - not necessarily American. A lot are our age, but a lot are older too. And most important, a lot don't speak French. So it's hard to combine the two groups, though when we do, everyone gets along. As for being couples or single, it's also a mix. Our expat friends tend to be married. I think that's because most of them I've met through volunteering before I could work. I met the "trailing spouses" who were also volunteering. I don't have that many single American friends because if they're here they work and thus, I've never had the chance to meet them. Our French friends are mostly co-workers of my husband. Some are married, some aren't.

If you are married or in a relationship with a person of another nationality, how has this experience enriched you as a person. What kind of challenges do you face?

To be honest, it's silly but the hardest thing for me being stuck in the 80's and Nickelodeon TV Land, I'm always wanting to reference something from my childhood that my husband just doesn't get! For instance if something breaks I always just want to say "Mom always said, don't play ball in the house." My husband fortunately come from the "new" generation so a lot of the complaints I hear from older American women don't apply. My husband DOES cook, help with the housework, etc. It will be interesting to see how he is with children some day. But I love that I am married to someone from another country. I've been able to do and see things that most tourists never get to do. First of all my language skills are so much better because I speak French all day. I've been able to really "know" a French family, going to marriages, funerals, Christmas dinner, etc. It's true that sometimes our cultural differences frustrate me, but at the same time our differences can make me appreciate things that I normally wouldn't.

What would be the best advice you could give someone with your relationship status that lives in your country of residence? Any other thoughts?

Learn the language if you haven't already! Do your best to remember that you are in THEIR country and it is up to you to adapt, but don't deny your own heritage. French people I know tend to enjoy my American "things" like Thanksgiving and Christmas stockings. Don't try to change the culture, just try to add to it.