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Expat Advice: Relationships in Bangalore, India

What is the name of the city or town that you are reporting on?

Bangalore

What is your current status? Are you single, dating, in a long-term relationship, married or divorced?

Dating and moving towards a long-term relationship...

What is it like in your country of residence for someone with your relationship status (married/divorced/dating)? If you're single, how do you meet other people? Do English-speaking people tend to gravitate to certain parts of your city?

After five months of living in India, I found myself a single woman in her mid-30's and facing my first experiences with culture shock in this country. Bangalore is a very interesting place culturally (talk about genuine diversity and acceptance in culture and religion!) as it is, but when you mix in dating, it really takes you on a cultural trip. Not only is India a decade behind the States in a lot of ways but with arranged marriages still in practice, it is even more behind in dating... most people have never really dated or just once or twice. I have met other people through colleagues, expat parties, coach surfing, meet-ups, Ok Cupid and now Tinder. Strangely, Tinder provided the best diversity and options for dating in Bangalore--- I am thinking it is because men only have to compose a brief paragraph about themselves and include pictures. Men tend to be rather lazy about filling out dating profiles. In terms of where to go out to meet singles, I suggest Indiranagar, MG road, Ulsoor Lake area, Brigade Road and Church Street. Because people tend not to mingle between groups while out, though, it is difficult to meet new people this way UNLESS YOU take initiative.

If you have children, what advice would you give to others making a similar transition to your country of residence?

I do not have children.

If you do not have children, do you generally spend your social time with other expat couples? If not, what else do you like to do as a couple?

I spend my time with couples and singles- I'm not elitist like that.

If you are married or in a relationship with a person of another nationality, how has this experience enriched you as a person. What kind of challenges do you face?

I have had a few brief relationships here in India, and they have been both interesting and alarming. Be careful dating in India. Men here have absolutely no problems lying about their current relationship standing (many are married or in relationships and looking to cheat). Do not jump into anything without double checking who the man is at many levels- most importantly, do his actions match his words. Not to harp on the obvious, but also be careful with strangers and blind dates--- always meet out in public for the first few dates and do not share where you live or your phone number until you are absolutely sure the guy is trustworthy and rational.

If you are a single parent, what advice would you give to others considering moving abroad?

Not a single parent.

What would be the best advice you could give someone with your relationship status that lives in your country of residence? Any other thoughts?

Be equally open-minded and careful/judgmental--- this is your safety and heart, after all. Be open-minded in the sense that you never know the package that a beloved will come in... I am open to all races and creeds... this has led to amazing connections with amazing people. I have been lied to repeatedly by men, and I have caught them in lies, luckily before I became too vunerable. Also, as a blonde woman with very white skin- I have to be extra on guard. Many men see me as a trophy or something to add to their score card here, rather than as a person with feelings and a complete history. All women, including Indian women, just be careful out there... there are tons of men to select from... don't put all your eggs into one basket and hold out for the best match for you!

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