A recent expat report on parenting abroad highlights the differences one might experience as an expat parent in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia vs. the United Kingdom. One of the most defining aspects of the expat experience is the on-the-ground reality for children and their parents. Expats can be sure that it will be a different life in a new country and culture. For better or worse, it simply won’t be the same had they stayed at home.

What are the strengths of your home culture’s parenting style? What are the weaknesses?

In the UK, parents talk a lot to their children, encouraging them to participate in working out problems and solutions. Education is more about working in teams to solve problems, rather than just completing worksheets as was often the case in local schools in Malaysia.

What are the strengths of your destination culture’s parenting style? What are the weaknesses?

I tutored students in Malaysia and was shocked at the level of studying that the children do. The Chinese and Korean families seemed to emphasis learning, with children often having several hours of tutors, studying and so on after school. One Korean boy that I taught started his studies at 3.30 am! While the parents seemed happy with this situation, I had children burst into tears…

Are there specific changes you have made to your parenting style while living abroad with your family? If yes, what are these changes?

I was unhappy with the standard of education in the International school that my son attended, so I removed him and began to homeschool instead. It was challenging for us both but I was surprised how much I enjoyed learning. Homeschooling brought us much closer together…

Overall, has the impact of being an expat positively influenced your parenting or negatively influenced your parenting? Why?

I believe that the difficulties and challenges that we faced living in Malaysia have brought our family much closer together…

The full text Kuala Lampur, Malaysia Expat Parenting report details more of the ups and downs of raising children and helping to educate them while living abroad.

Log in and Share Your Own Expat Parenting Report or Complete an Anonymous Expat Parenting Report.

So what’s it like to be an expat in London?

Here are a few tips on Moving to London from an article called 10 Tips for Living in London

6. Meeting People in London

Expat living in London recommended, “Because of the sheer diversity of London’s people, simply going down to a local pub will offer you many opportunities to socialise and make new friends.”

“Alumni clubs! Where’d you go to University? Where would you have LIKED to have gone to University? Find a club and go to their outings. They don’t mind. The more the merrier. The TexasExes are the largest partying group and can be found on http://www.for nogoodreason.com and will take in anyone. Come out and meet and greet. Junior League or American Womens Club – awesome groups and a quick set of people to get to know with loads of activities. Join up. They’re a friendly bunch, but you can decide yourselves. (more in the full-text article.)

7. Schools in London

In our article, London Schools for Expat Kids, we cover a number of the most popular school options including American Community School to TASIS England and The American School in London. Another article, A good school in London for the learning disabled focuses on The Centre Academy Schools which provides tremendous support for children with learning disabilities.

8. UK Work Permits

In the article, UK Work Permits, Skill Clear writes, “It is vital that the correct visa is obtained before travelling to the UK as you will usually not be able to correct any mistakes after you have arrived. The UK operates a Points Based System of visas, with individuals being awarded points for their age, level of education, past earnings and experience.”

And how does London stack up against other popular international cities? Here is an article that compares several popular expatriate destinations, and an excerpt from it about London:

London

People’s perceptions of London tend to vary widely. Some see a hectic dog-eat-dog environment, some see opportunities to make their name, fortune or both, others are simply drawn by the capital’s heritage, history and reputation as both a top party destination and the gateway to the rest of western Europe.

Whichever, thousands line up each year to give it their best shot.

While the work permit system is designed to protect British workers, in reality most sectors are open to expatriates who have either secured a job in advance or belong to one of the visa categories that allow them to enter the UK and then look for work.

And finally, go on to our UK Expat Forum and post some questions, and answer others!

Expats with kids always make good schools a priority. It’s an absolute deal breaker if they cannot find the right placement for their children.

In my 12 years of working with expats, it has been a constant. Expats will walk away from an assignment, and the one’s that don’t cry and wish they had.

This dynamic is currently playing out in Asia, as expats in Hong Kong are leaving because of school issues.

Some Hong Kong-bound expats have now delayed or cancelled moves because they can’t get their children in good preschool, primary or secondary international schools. Hong Kong Academy, a private international school, saw a 35% rise in applications last year.

While there has been a massive upsurge in demand, the number of places at English-speaking international schools has stayed relatively constant at 36,000.

Christopher Hammerbeck, the executive director of the British Chamber of Commerce in Hong Kong, said: “It is a fact that there now exists a shortage of places in international schools in Hong Kong and that this has been a fact for the past decade and a half, but it is a measure of the dramatic success of Hong Kong as one of the world’s leading trade and financial centres.”

Now, let’s contrast that with a single, young man from Connecticut who has relocated to Beijing as a lecturer at a university there, and thinks more young people should become expats in china.

Married people in Hong Kong have to leave because they can’t get their kids into a school, and a young man loving life in Beijing tries to sell it to others.

Same country, different world.

Homeschooling for expat children has been a reality for a long time. Parents can find it challenging to meet the needs of their children, even if they do not have any special needs that have to be taken into consideration. Lack of space, language barriers, and costs involved with international schools are just a few of the barriers that can get in the way of a successful international relocation for a family with school-aged children. That doesn’t even take local home-schooling regulations.

Here’s a recent thread from Expat Exchange member Rootstock that covers the topic of homeschooling in the U.K. One of the children has Autism, which obviously is a special cirumstance that has to be taken into consideration.

We have two children, one in first grade, and one in second grade. The second grader has an Autism spectrum diagnosis and dyslexia. He is able to be in a regular classroom with certain accommodations and he goes to a daily “pull-out” dyslexia reading program at school.

I’m *considering* homeschooling my children while we are in England. (Which may only be a year or so.) My reasons for this are related to my son’s special needs, but also due to a desire to have flexible time to explore the country and the city of London.

If anyone has had a similar experience in the U.K. or anywhere else in the world, please share your experiences with Rootstock. There have been some suggestions, such as Mumsnet and Ofsted.

Teaching abroad has been a popular topic on Expat Exchange since its inception in 1997. (That’s right – we’ve been here for 14 years now!) That’s something that is not likely to change, as there are more and more opportunities for teachers to work abroad.

A recent article by Anne Keeling, of Teachers International Consultancy (TIC), highlights that reality:

Charles is one of over 260,000 English-speaking teachers now teaching internationally and many more are heading that way thanks to the significant growth in international schools. In the last year alone, over 500 new English-speaking international schools were opened across the globe, taking the total number of international schools worldwide to 5,700. This is anticipated to grow to 8,000 international schools within five years according to data provided by ISC Research, the organisation that analyses developments in the international schools market.

Over the years, hundreds of international school reports have been filled out by expats living abroad. Anyone interested in getting a sense of what international schools are really like will find all kinds of information in them. While they’re filled out by parents, they have a lot to offer teachers and other parents alike.

According to the Expat Explorer survey conducted by HSBC International, nearly a third of expats receive some kind of financial support for their children’s edcuation. You can read about this in our Expat Insight section, which highlights key points from HSBC’s survey.

This is an important insight to highlight, however, because it’s such an important financial factor for expats with kids. We very frequently hear that this is one expense that expats with kids wish that they had really pushed for when negotiating their expatriate package.

Here is another article about Expat Package Negotiation, which offers general advice about what’s generally included in a package and managing expectations.

How to choose the best international school is an important task, but maybe not as important as choosing the RIGHT international School.

Expats who are teaching abroad, or individuals that would like to move overseas to teach, may be interested in a thread on the Global Forum that has been slowly developing over the course of the last several months.

Many countries have popped up in the conversation, as well as the introduction of a few books and resources that may be of value to those seriously considering such a career move. It would be very interesting to read responses from those that are already teaching abroad.

Here is the original post that got the ball rolling:

Hi, I am qualified ESOL (English for speaker of Other languages) Teacher. I have done my Teaching Course from Derby Collage, Derbyshire, UK. Thinking to move to some peaceful Island or Beach place and doing the teaching job there. Looking for sincere advice.

And here is one reply from JBernstein:

Beach? Island? Any other requirements?

If you are looking for a warm weather country, I would look towards South America, but as you are a Brit, and therefore an EU citizen, maybe you can find work teaching in Italy or Portugal?

You should look for other attributes of a school, than just location. If you are a night owl, then you want a language school situation where you can kick off work and party and then sleep until noon and STILL make it to work by 4.

Read the entire thread about Teaching & Living Abroad and then share your thoughts about moving overseas to teach!

Liz Perelstein of School Choice International recently contributed 8 Tips for Students Considering University Abroad to Expat Exchange.

As a counselor and therapist in the U.S.A., I know first hand that a lot of adolescents on the cusp of their collegiate careers have an eye well beyond the U.S. border. The article offers concise advice about the advantages of going to college in another country, and also important considerations to help assess whether or not the child in question is well suited for the international education experience.

While I read through the wonderful advice offered by Liz, I thought it obvious that much of what is covered also applies to adults that choose to move abroad. Yes, much of what is in the article applies directly to the educational experience, but there are parts that are easily generalized to the adult expatriate experience. Here is an example:

Liz writes the following…

Social Concerns: Is your child outgoing? Does s/he make friends easily? Will s/he be comfortable as part of a minority? Will s/he cling to his or her own minority and forego all opportunities to integrate with other cultures? As an international student, your child may need to try a little bit harder to make friends so s/he can build a support system quickly in a place where s/he may not know anyone, and may feel very out of place. If your child is adventurous and excited about meeting new and very different people, s/he may thrive in a new social environment like a foreign university.

Doesn’t much of this apply to anyone moving overseas? I think so. It’s often been written on Expat Exchange that if expats expect neighbors in their destination to come knocking on their door and do the social outreach them, they’re in for a long wait.

Good advice for a prospective college student? Yes, but in many ways it’s good advice for all. So it’s a good read for anyone with an eye toward the study abroad experience, but I’d also encourage all expats to read it and take advantage of Liz’s sage advice.

Expats with kids know how difficult moving overseas can be. There are so many factors involved, and each country is unique in terms of the challenges that will be presented. Conversely, there are also opportunities not available in one’s home country.

Here is the reaction of one professors child that attended a private school in England:

“I could not unaderstand that – it was so foreign that you’d go to school on Saturday,” [she] said. “It was one of those things that I just had to do.. getting up at 6 a.m. on Saturday thinking ‘this is not right, this is not okay.’”

And here’s an excerpt from the article about a professor that relocated to Switzerland:

Robert Cousins, a physics professor who works with the Large Hadron Collider, a particle accelerator in Switzerland, was surprised at how quickly his 7-year-old daughter picked up French while enrolled in a school on the border of France and Switzerland around 14 years ago.

It took only six months in a French school for her to become fluent. Along with living in a different country, learning a new language is a skill Cousins said contributes to a more diverse background.

These two excerpts on the experience abroad for kids highlights both the benefits and challenges.

Wouldn’t it be so much easier if we could predict the impact the international experience might have on our families? There are likely so many families with children that have turned down the experience that may have flourished abroad, and still others that shouldn’t have moved overseas and endured tremendous hardship at a great cost.

A recent survey of expats indicates that British expats do indeed enjoy a better life abroad than they do at home in the U.K.

The findings will strike a chord with millions of families in the UK struggling with soaring bills, sky-high house prices, pollution, traffic congestion and the battle to find a good school.
Those who have fled said they believed their children were enjoying ‘the good life.’ Typically, the schools are better, children are safer and life is cheaper.

It would be interesting to hear from some of these expats – or any other expats – as when these changes at home began to feel so burdensome and what might possible be done to turn the tide. That being said, here is another interesting tidbit I thought was worth highlighting:

In many cases, the poll by banking giant HSBC International found, British expats have ‘a greater sense of community’ than they do in their ‘home’ country.

Feel free to comment here or on any of our Expat Country Networks.