Just a heads up. Have you read the threads about dating and marrying an egyptian man? There are many entries and you might see some disturbing patterns. Do you speak arabic? Are you muslim? Are you older than he is? Are you more educated? Do you have a source of income greater than what he has? What part of egypt does he live in? Please read up on what a woman's rights are in egypt. 96 percent of all females are victims of vaginal mutilation. This is still going on. All i am saying is, every woman thinks she is the exception. You won't be. It is in the mentality land lifenin egypt is hard.

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Excuse me , As "melissa1984" said, u must be careful., but don't be pessimistic as well.

Just make sure that u don't pay him any money and he has a stable life here. Also check whether his propose is living with u or getting another citizenship.
After that, learn Arabic and read a lot about Egypt to be able to treat with people.
After all, May God give u both happiness and give u a happy family :)

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The only thing I'm going to say is DON'T marry him and think you're going to be happy living here in Egypt unless you've been here and seen the place.

Actually I'd search for groups on Facebook for women like you in your position. There are loads of them and many of the women live here already so I think you'll get a lot better and practical information there. You'll find women that have a lot of experience with this. Some successful stories and some not.

Best of luck but DO have a hack up plan in case things go south in this relationship.

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BACK up plan, not hack up plan.


Also I'm sure Melissa did not intend for her post to sound like ALL women get vaginally mutilated. They are only doing this to young girls. It won't happen to you. Sorry Melissa but the way you wrote it, it sounded like ALL women were examined and fixed if they weren't right. LOL

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Thank you for taking the time to reply to my post. I greatly appreciate it.
I have read a LOT of negative stories about western women marrying an Egyptian man and yes it is disturbing but I am willing to take the risk as I love this man very much,
I do not speak arabic and I am not muslim. I am 10 years younger than he is. I am not more educated than him and our incomes are almost similar. He lives in Alexandria.
The vaginal mutilation part is scary, but am I safe to think that this does NOT happen to foreign women living in Egypt?

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Thank you very much for your words of advice and blessings.
I am definitely going to be cautious but at the same time I don't want to fear trying this marriage out with this person.
From what I can see he does have a fairly stable life and he seems very relaxed about where we live, whether it would be in Egypt or in my own country. There's no way for me to know 100% for sure that he is looking for citizenship but I don't think that he is.

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Thank you. I have not been to Egypt before. The only reason I am moving is so I can be with him.
I am not expecting to move and be happy but I am hoping we can both work at it and transitioning me into my new life there with him.
Thanks also for the suggestion of the groups. I am going to seek them out.

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Phew!! Thank you SO much for clearing this up for me. After reading the post. I was rather concerned and looking to obtain more information on this. Thanks again!

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It is true, adult women aren't hunted down, although i am of the opinion that western women are often hunted down for other things like money. Good luck. Take care of your own interests.

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I wish you "GOOD LUCK" in whatever decision you make although from "YEARS" of experience with the culture of Egypt and the Middle East....you will NEVER be "one of them.....not to say that you won't be accepted in this man's family! Who's to say??????? I love Egypt and all it's GOOD people and especially now with all that has happened with the revolution and now the tourist industry is really really hurting as I still have a male american friend who has been living there in Cairo for 14 years and more so I get information all the time of what is going on there! You have NEVER been to Egypt.....it is another world believe me....AND I miss it very much but would not go back for several personal reasons!!!!! No matter what your read on this "Forum" or what anyone tells you....you will in the end make your decision and "LEARN" on your own!!!!!! I wish you happiness and the VERY BEST with your situation!!!! I fell in love with an Egyptian and still love him......although he died two years ago and I am still mourning his death sad to say!!!!!!!!!! Things were not good either for me but I was an "ALLOWER" for a LONG time!!!!! ANYWAY.....I could write a HUGE NOVEL about my situation!!! WISHING YOU BOTH THE BEST....INSHALLAH!!!!!! GOD BLESS AND ANGELS BE NEAR!!!!!!!!!!

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Few things to say:

IF this man is 10 yrs older than yourself I'd put him, at a minimum in his late 20ies/early 30ies. That is VERY OLD for an Egyptian NOT to have been married with a first wife. If he is 40 or so then I would strongly suggest you could be coming in as a 2nd wife to "augment" and "help out" anything that needs helping out. You will have LESS than no status and the Expat community living there will look at you only with contempt for being so silly as to have gotten involved with an Egyptian.

Research him FIRST. Insist on an extended stay visit. Learn the language, experience the customs and mostly LEARN all about HIM! Do not necessarily trust his friends to vouch for him as they will willingly lie. Be there long enough to KNOW 100% that his employment, family, living situation is legit.

Secondly - if he was to marry an Egyptian woman all her "conditions" re: marriage would be spelled out contractually and I would STRONGLY suggest you do the same. For example - You might think (and he might even agree) you'd like to return to your home every year or every other year. PUT IT IN A MARRIAGE CONTRACT as once you are married and living in Egypt he has TOTAL AND COMPLETE CONTROL over you. Anything he may have promised is nul and void and there is NOBODY there who can help you.

Think 'pre-nuptual' and have it signed in writing/translated officially into Arabic and have it all signed and sealed on ANY conditions you even remotely think you might need or want otherwise you could be consigned to zero.

An Egyptian is not raised and socialized to think in terms of "love for ever after" as western people are. From Birth they have lived with a very very VERY different mindset. He is Muslim and once he is in Egypt he can do what he wants. His "Mom" will always come first as will his family.

I could go on and on and on. Make sure you have a thought out exit plan and I'd strongly suggest you go there for an extended stay PRIOR to marriage. Protect yourself and do not become another statistic.

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If there was a LIKE button to click for Wafa's message, I'd be clicking it!

She made some good points.

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Thank you every one so very much for helping me out in so much depth. I appreciate all the help I am getting.

I am just wondering how can I get a VISA for an extended time to come to Egypt to spend time with him to suss him out?
I initially wanted to come there and get a place together and see how things go before getting married but he said dating is forbidden there and we can't live under the same roof unless we are married. So I figured that ruled out me coming there and living together.

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Sounds like u r doing a good job of doing a little detective work before tying the knot. The women and men on this site are amazingly helpful in sharing their experiences. There is also a gentleman on this site who has lived his whole life in egypt and has an incredibally lucid view on things. Magnumjoe is in his email address so look for his posts in the area of this site that deals with women dating egyptian men. And you can always send personal messages to anyone on this site. Generally the whole get married quick thing is at the heart of the problem. Afterall not wise to make the most important decision in your life with very little info. Egyptian men tend to be charming, romantic, funny, etc. You just want to know if that is the real deal or part of the come on.

You haven't shared how you met, his situation, the situation and so on. Like i said earlier, the patterns for western women with egyptian men are strikingly similiar although no one believes that until after the fact. So do your homework, don't do anything quickly and even suggest u have no money and would expect him to pay all the bills. Is he younger than u? Does he live in a tourist area? Suggest he pay for half your airfare. also go to amnesty international and check out what your rights are once married to an egyptian man, esp. if children become involved.

Sorry if this is so thorough but i am a lawyer and as such have seen a lot.....esp. With your scenario. Still think magnumjoe's comments are tremendously insightful given that he is a young, educated egyptian male who is bright and insightful. Good luck and remember to be your own advocate. Best wishes!

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Hi Tiffany!

Did anyone actually answer your question about how to get your visa?

I am an American and I moved married my husband here, so getting my visa was probably a littler simpler than yours would be if you marry abroad.

Honestly, if you plan to live in Egypt it might be easier to make it legal here...because your getting a visa will basically be you guys running around to like 2-4 different governmental offices to certify, stamp, prove your marriage, blah blah blah.... and it's a really big pain with Egyptian papers; so I imagine it could be a bigger pain with papers from outside.

Once we finally took the last steps at the immigration offices, all of our documentation in hand, to get my residency, we just filled out a 1 or 2 page application and gave it to the lady at the window. She told us they would send someone to our building to ask our neighbors about us and whether we're really married (to prevent me using my husband for a visa, LOL) and to return in 2 weeks. I can't say whether or not anyone ever came to investigate us, but 2 weeks later we showed up and got a big residency sticker placed in my passport (Hooray, I'm legal!)

If you have any more specific questions, please lmk and I'll try to help. I signed up for this website just to chime in....Best wishes in your marriage girly!!!

(PS, you may want to live here for some months before deciding to move here. I don't think it's anything like Austrailia :P)

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I am so happy engaged/sort of married to the man of my dreams and living in Cairo. The constant noise of vehicles, donkeys, dogs, children and people hawking food, natural gas and who knows what causes me some stress and the call to prayer is loud too. It's not possible to just go for a stroll here. You can't get lost in thought while walking because you must watch where you step from all the garbage and lack of pavement but most of all because unless you are in a pricey area there are no real sidewalks and you have to turn sideways sometimes for cars to pass. I've been hit by several rear view mirrors. Prepare to play Frogger with only one life - yours- while walking around Cairo. I suggest using your husband as a human shield until you have a lot of practice crossing highways and streets with traffic that doesn't stop. Don't fantasize cooking up gourmet meals for your man - the ingredients are not to be found. Expect to spend a lot of time in your home, that's what women do. At first, I thought it was not good for women but now that it's the height of summer I think women have the better part. It's really a third world country and worse it's a desert. I could walk for miles in several directions from our apartment and not see a tree. I need to wash my hair constantly because it gets so dusty if I go out and everything in the apartment is covered in dirt because we don't have air conditioning and keep the windows open. We spend ~$700 dollars a month only - each contributing half. He won't spend more of my money so far even though I dearly want air conditioning but I think he is going to cave about spending a little bit once we are married because he is getting used to the idea that by Egyptian standards we are very well off even though we would just be middle class in the US. I want to go back to the US but not without my love. It's really harsh living here but he makes it worthwhile. We aren't living in his hometown because everyone would know we aren't married and it's illegal and a big no-no to live together so we are pretty alone. We've gone to a few meetups with expats from internations but we didn't really make friends. Wait until you ride a mircrobus!!!! All that being said - my fiancé is AWESOME and I am so proud of myself because his friends and family who wen to great lengths to warn him against an American say that I don't act American. My fiance and plan to marry next month and I couldn't be happier. When I think of all the racist things and craziness that people said to me to convince me that my fiance was using me or going to harm me I laugh. The best one I heard was - "he is going to steal your passport" Well at my age in my mid 40's that sounds pretty damn exciting! The fact is though - your man keeps all the family's important documents. Marriage is different here in Egypt - I am sort of married because we signed a paper that we are married before his friend would let us rent an apartment - it is urfi marriage. I recommend BEFORE you marry in Australia that you also sort of marry your man and live together in Egypt to see if you really really want to live in with your love for the rest of your life. One thing you give up is privacy. I write this knowing he may read it and not like something I say. He is on my facebook and reads my email. However, he hides nothing from me either. This was the biggest adjustment for me. But as I grew to trust him more and more I began to see that no privacy between each other is wonderful. He doesn't judge me harshly or ever say something I write is stupid. He is so supportive of me and I am working on my writing and hoping to get published. I was so unhappy when I met him! Still I recommend living together like we are doing before you get married and living in Egypt for at least a few months before you commit to a lifetime. Get a 30 day tourist visa and then renew it for a six month visa. Where you get your visa is purgatory and don't accept it when the woman tells you only 3 months or tells you no - go to an officer to get six months. Once you are married - I don't know if you need to get your marriage certificate from Australia certified or not - you can get a 4 year visa. Until you get the residency visa you won't be able to open a bank account. You stated that you and he earn the same amount - then maybe he is too good for you!!!!! - just joking - but teachers only earn around $400 a month! If your man is earning what you are earning in Australia he's really well off and you might have a totally different experience than me. Just my two cents.... We might be moving to Alexandria and we'd love to get together!

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I lived in Egypt for 4 years - 1997-2001 - and knew American & European women who were married to Egyptians - also have known women here in the US married to Middle Easterners in general. I love Egypt, had generally good experiences there, and miss many aspects and people. However, take very seriously the advice from posters on this forum who tell you to be careful. If you have children, they will legally belong to the father and if you should want to take them out of the country, you will not be able to do so without his permission, and if you should want a divorce - then things get really dicey. I've knew a woman who originally totally rejected the idea of ever wanting a divorce - but eventually did. I would strongly advise that you live in Egypt for as long as possible before marrying him - not with him, which would be really unacceptable, not with his family either. Getting a visa and having it renewed for an American is not that problematic - at least it wasn't - hopefully since the Arab Spring uprisings that hasn't changed. Friends tell me that the Egypt I knew is now very different - so you REALLy need to spend some time there & get to know some Americans or Europeans married to Egyptians. The govt was always in the face of ordinary Egyptians, but I hear it is much worse now.
Do not marry this man without living there on your own for as long as possible. Getting a job for English speakers was not that difficult - maybe it still isn't.

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In my post, I forgot you are an Australian - sorry - but everything I cautioned would apply to you also.

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