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Expat Advice: Culture Shock in Verona, Italy

What is the name of the city or town that you are reporting on?

Verona

Did you receive any cross-cultural training for your move abroad? If yes, was it before or after the move?

Yes, from my Italian sweetheart as well as my military service around the world.

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If they speak another language in your new country, do you speak the language? If yes, did you learn the language before you moved or while abroad? If no, are you planning to learn the language?

No, I'm lazy but I know enough to get by.

Were you worried or concerned about culture shock before you moved abroad?

Not so much but it living in Italy isn't all as glamours as it is when you simply visit for a few days or 2-3 weeks. The flare goes away quite quickly when you realize its a third world country in comparison to the USA e.g. medical, utilities, car costs, toll roads and fuel.

How significant was the culture shock you experienced when you moved abroad?

Moderate to significant but you will adjust after 6-8 months.

Expats often talk about going through the "stages of culture shock." Examples include the honeymoon phase, the irritation-to-anger stage, the rejection of the culture stage, and the cultural adjustment phase. Do you feel like you went through these or any other stages as you settled into the new culture?

Yes, yes and yes. Once you become part of the fabric, you learn that its just another place but a lot more expensive! The food is great and that includes FRESH produce! It's the entire country is a Whole Foods store.

What, if any, were some of the changes you noticed in yourself that might have been caused by culture shock? These might include things such as anger, depression, anxiety, increased eating or drinking, frustration, homesickness, etc.

Frustration with store hours and the inferior quality of many goods. Oh, and forget about returning anything for any reason.

What are some things you appreciate most about the new culture?

People are usually more sincere after you’re accepted. Whatever you do, don't ever tell an Italian how its done better in America.

What are the most challenging aspects of the new culture?

Well, I’m retired from the US Army and fiancée is Italian and lives in the north. I have visited there fairly often and I have also been stationed throughout Europe. It’s very pricy but the culture is very nice! However, there are drawbacks to all the glamour. American’s will have to accept many concessions as to lifestyle. Shops have segmented work hours; utilities are markedly higher, and you can completely forget about returning anything you buy, regardless of the reason. Theft is fairly common so watch your property and your back. Also, you need to consider medical provisions as well. Get sick and go to a doctor can be a real eye opener. BTW: If you think fuel prices are high in the US of A then you’ll get a rude awakening when you fill up a car in Italy. If that doesn’t affect you, the highway toll fees will. Still, the United States is clearly going to hell in a hand basket so these seemingly stark drawbacks may not be all that bad.

Did you "commit" any embarrassing or humorous cultural blunders? If you did and you'd like to share them, please do tell!

Don't expect people to smile and say hello as you pass someone on the street. They won't even make eye contact with you unless you're in the down town shopping districts.

I wash my car while bareback and I deeply offended a few people. It is considered very rude to display your body in public.

Do you have any advice or thoughts about culture shock you would like to share?

Don't tip as it is not required and they will consider you as stupid. Sure, they'll take it but they won't respect you. Also, drink your coffee slowly, regardless of the thimble size cups.

On the Italy Expat Forum

Join our Italy Forum and talk with other expats in Italy who can offer you insight and tips about living in Italy. Here are a few of the latest discussions on the Italy Expat Forum:

Italy expat forum topic
Applying for Italian Citizenship in USA (33 replies)

Hello everyone. I have several questions so I will mark them starting with #1. I would like to apply for my Italian Citizenship along with my 2 adult children (18&21). My jurisdiction Italian Consulate is Chicago(I do not live in that state). I have sent 65 emails (no response)& called them for over 1 year & they do not answer the phone!! Maybe you can help me. I already have my father's Italian birth certificate from Italy, his marriage certificate and naturalization paper from USA. I have mine, my 2 adult children birth certificate with apostille.I have an appt for November, 2020, we have to fly to Chicago PLUS rent a car & hotel...and I made 1 appointment thinking my whole family will attended to at this appt, then I read in some forums each applicant must make hisher own appt?? If this is true what should I do?? We all need to be processed at the same time.....(That's #1 question) OK here's my other questions and sorry so many questions but I need to get to Italy ASAP as an Italian citizen. #2 -What other formsdocuments, where do I get the formsdocuments that I need and how much is the cost? Do I write a personal check or money order for each of these forms? #3-How long does the whole process take if I apply for my Italian citizenship in USA? #4- Do I need to prove any kind of fundssavings I have in bank or do I need to prove anything else??#5- I am on SSDI so I live on my money from SSDI, so I can not work or working. #6- What am I missing as far as what else I need? Thx in advance everyone...

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Italy expat forum topic
Unmarried couple with child. He qualifies for citizenship. (4 replies)

Hi. I’ve learned a bunch reading your posts (thank you) and I am wondering if you can please answer a couple of questions. My long-time live-in boyfriend of nearly 17 years, the father of our 3-year old daughter--my husband for intents and purposes, but not by law, qualifies for Italian citizenship. We just realized this last week. His grandmother was from Naples, married his American military grandfather, moved to the U.S., had a green card, never became naturalized, and had a daughter, his mom, who was born after 1948. His mom didn’t renounce her citizenship. Some research made this news less exciting as we realized he’d have to deal with the SF consulate, and that would probably take a very very long. We were already looking into moving to Europe (we checked out Portugal in November, and were aiming for long term residency there via d7 visa) when I stumbled upon this information, and it seems like a much better option for him and our daughter to have citizenship and have the ability to move around the EU. So we’d like to go to Italy to do the paperwork there because it would be faster, and also, because we were already wanting to go somewhere for an adventure. But how would that work out for me? Would I be subjected to regular Schengen visa time limits and not granted a permesso di soggiorno because we’re not married? Or would I be able to be able to get a permesso di soggiorno along with my partner and our daughter? We’re not married because not married, but we could be married. We just never did that because I felt funny about the dress and wedding and fuss and all, and we were always working and moved quite a few times, and then a bunch of years passed. But so, we could get married if I can’t stay with them. Does anyone know the answer to this? And then, if the answer is that I’d have to deal with regular Schengen visa time limits, and then we decide to get married so that I can get a permesso di soggiorno also, would it matter to get married in the U.S. before we left or in Italy like a month or two into our time there? Thank you for your help.

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Italy expat forum topic
Do I have everything I need? (3 replies)

Good afternoon. I will be requesting dual citizenship(Italian Citizenship) in Italy. I was wondering if you kind people can help me out and if I have everything I need. I have 3 daughters 18, 22, 29 yrs old. I have my mothers birth certificate, marriage certificate, USA naturlization certificate. I have myself and my daughter's USA birth certificates with the Apostille and translated into Italian. I have my divorce decree translated in Italian. So I go to the Questura where I will be living in Italy and will they give me all the forms we need to fill out for Italian citizenship or does the post office give me the forms? What forms do we need and how much are they$$? After filling out the forms for each family member what type of payment do they take?(cash, money order?) Then after filling out the forms we just pop back in the Questura and tellthem we want Italian Citizenship (Dual)? How many days will we have to find us a place to live? When we get to Italy we must go to Questura and tell them we need to stay more than 3 months and why, correct? Is this when they issue the Permesso di soggiorno? Finally, how long will it take for us to become Italian Citizens? *I hope I have not missed any steps here if so please help me out and what the correct steps are. Grazie!

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Comments about this Report

guest
Oct 7, 2010 04:03

I bought some items here in italy and I returned them with no problem. I bought the wrong size shoes. In customer services, I think Italians do what they want if they can get away with it.

guest
Oct 21, 2010 10:51

Return policies in Italy are governed by state law which requires store owners to accept returns only if the item is in some way defective or deceptive (eg size 6 shoes in a box with size 8 written on it), even if these items have been sold in a sale. All other returns are considered to be at the shopowners discretion - I generally have found that they are fairly accomodating as long as the item is returned within a reasonable time frame although many of them only offer the possibility of exchanging the item with one of similar value.

guest
Aug 28, 2011 09:09

" its a third world country in comparison to the USA" For the higway and fuel costs? Medical...really sure that usa is better?? Always heard that if you are not whealty enough to afford private clinics, public sanity leave quite enought to complain about (In usa more than in italy) " It is considered very rude to display your body in public."??? Ever been in a beach in italy? Are you able to go topless, or even full nude in any place in usa? Because in italy is commonly accepted. "don't ever tell an Italian how its done better in America" Why should you do that? In my opinion your evaluation standars are different from the rest of the world, and honestly sounds a bit silly to me. If not,... i might have been living too many years in a different country that italy, cause surely that is a country which vary so much depending on the places where u go (and there's too many dislikes), but too many of your perceptions sounds quite weird to me.

guest
Mar 6, 2012 22:53

Italians are straight forward they lell you to you face if u not good and medical well its sends a mesage out americans they live on fast food so does the british and it cost nhs eat healthy at home and eat out once a week o and keep of the alcahol drink

guest
Mar 9, 2012 20:07

I don't get this person's criticisms. I think it might be because he has been in the military for a long time, and expects things to be "in order". Yes, the large Italian metropolitan areas are expensive - as they are all over Europe. Northern Italy is a very sophisticated place with excellent transportation (btw, the rest stops that frequent Italian highways put American rest stops to shame, by a long shot - as well as often serving superb snacks and small bites). I find people friendly, but somewhat reserved. That's true in most places. It's not Long Beach, CA. Food is uniformly of high quality, and reasonably priced. Once one knows one's way around, one discovers ways to economize, if necessary. I think the key here is that no matter where one ends up as an expat, there is going to be some adjustment to be made. Those that are more rigid or controlled in their outlook (not a bad thing, just a personal proclivity) - or who are constantly comparing everything with what they *know* in America, are going to have a more difficult period of adjustment.

krism
Dec 26, 2013 18:10

I think part of the main reason the OP didn't have a great experience is the lack of effort in terms of learning the language. No matter where you go, if you don't make an effort to learn the language but you plan to live there, locals tend to brush you off. The US is the same way, many people who don't speak English will get brushed off, because it's hard to explain things within a limited vocabulary.

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